writer's block

oh my god i really don’t want to do this

i think on some level it’s self sabotage, like it’s pretty clear to me that tomorrow i should write about posting for 30 days, so now is my last chance to fuck this up

i’ve heard that writer’s block isn’t a technique problem, it’s a sincerity problem. i think i’m less gung ho on sincerity than most people around here. at least i am much less in favor of online sincerity & openness. like. i’m not lying to y’all but i don’t really value you knowing what my life is like, or what i’m like, & i also think that the internet is not a great place to try to be honest with people. idk. i think we’re currently underindexed on fiction. which is on me too it’s not like i’m posting fiction really much

i think that when people attempt to be sincere to the wrong audience or at the wrong time, they often get really twisted up. like if you talk publicly prematurely about something i think you can end up crystallizing a wrong understanding. or if you’re trying people you don’t really trust (and i don’t trust *the internet* & neither do you) you’ll twist the truth until you come up with a version you’ll be okay with people hearing. & if you value feeling honest then you’ll believe what you say….

man i can probably only get away with a post like this once & i used this card pretty early lmao