the solution

(haters thought i forgot to post today)

she notices that they aren’t eating dinner together anymore. first she tries waiting for him; he gets home later and later. then she tries cooking what she knows he likes best; he goes on a restrictive diet. then she tries telling him her needs. he agrees with her and doesn’t change. then she tries fighting. fighting sort of works. she can reliably start a fight about dinner and get him to join her in the fight. they can fight about dinner at any time of day. they can have a text fight about dinner plans while they’re at work. it gets to the point where they can fight about dinner while eating breakfast together. there are only two problems with this strategy. the first is that she can’t notice that it’s working, that when they’re fighting they are connecting, because if she does notice then they have nothing to fight about and then where will she be? the other problem is tolerance, the need to raise the stakes each time. eventually she raises the stakes so high that he gets scared and comes home for dinner at six the next day. she doesn’t have anything made. they have to order ubereats. he’s home for six the next day, and the next. and the day after that he takes off early to make her dinner. she feels weird eating in front of him now, unsure how to balance conversation with consuming, for the first time wondering if he’s judging what she eats, and even judging what he eats herself. she eats less and less at dinnertime, not feeling hungry then. they sit at the table looking at their phones, and she snacks in the evening while he plays videogames. one day, while she snacks and he plays, she remembers that they used to go to bed at the same time. she remembers pillowtalk. she texts him, “i miss you, come to bed.” he misses the text. when he finally comes up they fight about that. the next day, without even noticing, she eats with him unselfconsciously, gearing up for this new bedtime fight.